I AM A SOUL

When I want you your here,
 The need for intimacy you evade.
I've always thought you were poison but how could I have convinced myself.
I drank and feasted on the temporary you so lightly provided...
You should have come with warning signs..
"Deadly! Approach with caution!..."
I wasn't stupid, I just thought you would be different,
Eternity should have done a better job.
But how could you treat me any different...I always convinced myself the Lord is my shepherd I shall not want. Still I wanted... Fulfilment though as temporary made everything else bearable.
I wont complain I'll gladly walk away because you were never there.
 I will walk away knowing that the song of a victim cant be sang by mere men
How could they when it has neither rhythm, verses, nor lyrics!
The song of a victim is sang with a head laid on the pillow
Hands pressed between thighs
Its sang by humming and only the cascading of tears are allowed the crooked dance past ears where They die into a pillowed (nb) case
The broken don't  speak least the world laughs
The rejected don't  try... they accept all opportunities all of which prove fatal
The abused don't  cry all pain is the same and emotional suffering is invented  mental torment
The victims are brave enough to see the good ... to see
To sing " it is well"
With my soul yes..
But how can time turn it's back to look back...
Put back that which represents covenant with the most high.
My brokenness and pain only there to remind me it is well
Yet as I pick myself up...the ground speaks volumes...
I was laying on it the whole time?
Always looking up to you and you down on me
I had both hands stretched out to you never holding  back
You leaned in almost to pick me up...
Turns out you were picking up lost change I should have known,
They told me and their silence couldn't be any louder.
All My energies wasted for your pleasure alienation was your sole purpose
Your good. Really good. Soon as you got the change you left.
I saw you walk away with all of my stuff and I didn't have nothing. It is was never well with my body.
Drag ma humiliated ego to your friends... gossip column whip lashing me the traitor
Only for speaking up
"Forgive my insolence" I said
My head bowed so far down I  could kiss the muddy ground as I  walked away
Walked back to a small corner
The rejected's circle and we spoke the same language that soothed my wretched spirit
I know skies are always blue.
I know two oceans that meet can't mix.
 I don't  wish for change because mountains hold steadily
I don't ask for progress because where ever a rivulet  goes there is a river and where ever a river ends there are oceans.
I fear my end as thus so I  ask that my sight be blind to the intensity and depth of the this unyielding pain
 And so I lay back look up my ceiling
Legs crossed
Both arms behind my head and
I smile because that's all I have left.
I can only hope you won't take that away from me either.
I found solace in the strangest place. It shall be well.
A half broken smile... and an unfinished giggle steals at my teary eyes.
Pure soul
I am a purely a soul





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